Remember that alcoholism is a disease and recovery is possible with the right support and treatment. If your spouse is ready to seek professional help, or if you need assistance in understanding treatment options, consider contacting The Recovery Village. With a network of rehabilitation facilities and comprehensive services, The Recovery Village offers multiple treatment programs designed to address the unique needs of each individual. No one has to face alcohol addiction alone; help and hope are available. Problematic drinking can have a significant financial impact on the household.
- You (or your husband) may feel tempted to withdraw from social circles because you’re embarrassed that he smells like alcohol or has erratic behavior.
- If your spouse is ready to seek professional help, or if you need assistance in understanding treatment options, consider contacting The Recovery Village.
- Due to the cyclical nature of their sobriety, it becomes normal, perhaps, to accept a certain level of distrust, or caution, or a lack of love.
Retirement Accounts, Pension Plans and Divorce
- Keep in mind that someone with alcohol dependence usually goes through a few stages before they are ready to make a change.
- Addicts (even during the times they are sober) can’t cope with any type of stress or conflict, and therefore cannot communicate effectively with others, especially a spouse.
- This kind of pain doesn’t leave bruises, but it can leave deep scars.
The focus then becomes what you did (moved them) rather than what they did (drinking so much that they passed out outside). Often, in trying to “help,” well-meaning loved ones will actually do something that enables someone dependent on alcohol to continue along their destructive paths. Make sure that you are not doing anything that bolsters their denial or prevents them from facing the natural consequences of their actions. If family members try to “help” by covering up for their drinking and making excuses for them, they are playing right into their loved one’s denial game. Dealing with the problem openly and honestly is the best approach.
Financial Instability
For others, the spouse has reluctantly understood the decision, but due to the chaos brought about by their alcoholism, they’ve been unable to manage their side of the divorce process. I feel terrible for this couple because alcohol addiction is a tricky disease that Alcoholics Anonymous causes so much conflict and pain, and destroys marriages and lives. One should always remember that alcoholism is not a bad habit, but a real disease.
How long should you stay with someone who has a problem with alcohol?
Leaving an alcoholic partner is a difficult but courageous step toward prioritizing your own well-being and future happiness. Although the decision to leave may bring moments of doubt or guilt, remember that maintaining a healthy and fulfilling life is within your reach. By seeking support, focusing on self-care, and building a new chapter independently, you can move forward with resilience and compassion. Prepare yourself by seeking support from friends, family, or a therapist, and remind yourself that prioritizing your health is not selfish—it’s necessary. Allow yourself to feel sadness, disappointment, or grief, but remember that these feelings are part of the healing process. Living with an alcoholic boyfriend or girlfriend can take a heavy emotional toll.
You’ve likely been through extensive back-and-forth with your spouse over this issue. Promises can be made – and even kept – for periods, but if you still find yourself asking if it’s okay to leave an alcoholic spouse, there has clearly been no long-term change. Be intentional about caring for yourself during this stressful time. Try to eat nutritious foods, get adequate rest, and exercise when possible. Seek professional counseling to process your emotions in a healthy way.
Health and Wellness After Divorce
If your partner is willing to seek help and work towards sobriety, then it may be worth staying in the relationship. However, if your partner is not willing to seek help and their drinking is negatively impacting your life, it may be time to leave. Remember to take care of yourself and seek support if you need it. There can be custody issues if there are children involved when one parent struggles with alcoholism. When a parent struggles with substance abuse, it can severely affect their ability to provide a safe and stable environment for their child, impacting custody should i leave my alcoholic husband decisions.
Police Alcoholism – Guide to Alcohol Rehabilitation
But, in reality, these behaviours are keeping you both stuck. I highly recommend the book Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood to help you identify harmful patterns of behaviour. Jackie Pilossoph, former Chicago Tribune Syndicated Columnist (LOVE ESSENTIALLY) is the Founder of DIVORCED GIRL SMILING. Divorced Girl Smiling (DGS), which is a well-known brand and community, offers a list of trusted, vetted divorce professionals, a podcast, articles and the free consult.
Impact on Your Mental Health
While showing compassion, you must also set healthy boundaries to shield yourself and children from the harmful effects of his drinking. Do not enable his alcohol use by making excuses or covering up for him. When one starts living with a functioning alcoholic husband, they try to take control of situations, as mentioned above, and behave as a counselor.
When you talk to your spouse, remember to be kind and supportive, avoiding judgmental remarks. ” say something like, “I want to understand what this experience is like for you and help you in any way I can.” Your compassion may help your husband to be more open to receiving help. Educate yourself about alcohol use disorder (AUD) by turning to reputable sources. Learn everything you can about addiction, its effects, and available treatment options.
How To Help An Alcoholic Seek Help For Their Addiction
The answers to these questions can help you determine if and when it is time to leave a relationship with a partner who has an alcohol use disorder. For most people with alcoholism, complete abstinence from alcohol is necessary for long-term recovery. However, some individuals may be able to drink in moderation after a period of sustained sobriety and with careful monitoring from healthcare professionals. First and foremost, it’s important to recognize that alcoholism is a disease that requires professional treatment. It’s not caused by external factors such as stress or relationship problems, and it can’t be cured by simply abstaining from alcohol.
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